How often have you hesitated to do the thing your really want to do because you worry what ‘the others’ might say?
It is one of the most common excuses you might be using to procrastinate.
What sort of thoughts go through your head when you wonder whether to take that step and make the change you have decided to make?

  • They won’t like me any more
  • They will think I’m being stupid
  • They will say ‘what a waste’
  • I’ll upset them if I go ahead
  • They will think I’m selfish

When you want to do something which is likely to have some sort of effect on others then you must realise that whatever you think about their possible reactions , you do not actually know, your thoughts are just that: your thoughts.

What you can do is:

  • Find out directly about their opinion.
  • Communicate.
  • Tell them what you want to do and ask for their comments
  • Listen to their response

What you may find is:

  • They offer you some useful constructive suggestions to do what you want to do more efficiently.
  • They  are opposed to what you want to do based on their fears for your welfare.
  • They are opposed to what you want to do based on how they think they will be affected by it.

So as part of your listening, consider how to re-assure and respond to their comments and concerns.

Then think about yourself and the life you want and what you must do to achieve this. If it is possible to discover a win-win way to achieve this then follow that path. However if the only reason of not doing what you want is because you are told not to do it, then  remember that everyone has a choice including you. The others can choose whether to accept or reject your suggestions. You have the choice to do or not to do.

If you feel stuck because you  feel that upsetting people important to you is just too big a step to take, then keep talking, keep on discussing and communication with them and others to eventually discover ways forward which you may not have considered previously.

That may involve re-examining your motives for change and what would happen if you do nothing.  You may find that your expectations for your life need to be re-examined. Perhaps what you wanted for yourself years ago has now changed but you remain stuck in those of the past.

CLICK HERE to discover ways to become a ‘new you’?